I wanna go on a date dammit! Like a real, honest to goodness, true to life, it-took- me-all-day-to-leave-the-house-looking-like-this-but-dammit-if-I-don’t-look-good-as-a-muthafucka date. Youknowhatimsayin?
Today at work we discovered two important things about modern day relationships. #1: Psuedo boyfriends are is style. (I’m such a fuckin’ trendsetter.) (Is my potty mouth getting worse?) (Well what can ya do? I say fuck it.) And #2, NOBODY DATES ANYMORE.
When I first got to HU, I remember freshman year having a huge roundtable discussion in The Cafe about how people don’t date anymore and that the fishbowl life that was campus existence only made it worse. At the time I didn’t buy it but now I’m beginninng to wonder…
Look at the evidence…
The last time I went on a date was with Mr. Wonderful. LAST DECEMBER. That’s over year ago! Craziness. Before that, it was my Perfect Date that me and Almost Fiance went on waaaay before we ever made it official and then almost immediately hit the skids, wrapped ourselves around a tree, stayed in the vehicle as it burst into flame only to stagger out and die in the middle of the street.
WOW. That was ALOT. Lol!
Before that it was First Love back in friggin’ high school which was AT LEAST 37 years ago (it seems.) (What?!?! Well, it does!!!)
Maybe they had it right way back at HU. Maybe people DON’T date anymore. Maybe we’ve all foregone the behavior in favor of random hookups and one night stands. Maybe I missed last call and the lights have long since been off.
I dunno. I just wanna go on a date. I wanna get all cute and go out and be all smiley and giggly and flirty and all “yeah I’m out with him” and such. Idealistic of me, yes. But so necessary for me to get this outta my system so I can get back to my Will and Grace dvds and my comfy Gap body pajamas, lol.
That is all.