I know we’re doing the same thing…
Waiting for the other to make contact.
And it’s silly, really.
Especially cuz we both know I’m not gonna break first.
I keep looking at my phone. Not LOOKING really, but just GLANCING, maybe sending it a telepathetic message of sorts telling it to make some kinda noise.
And I just KNOW we’re doing the same thing.
I sit down and talk to myself. “Self,” I say to me, “you’re being silly. Really, this is just juvenille. Does it matter who says something first?”
Then my other self, my prideful self, says, “BITCH SIT DOWN!!!”
So I do what’s most logical.
But I’m WATCHING my phone. GLANCING, really. Not even a glance more like a nonchalant type noticing, like, oh look! My phone.
If you will.
The chime sounds signaling I’ve received a text. I smile, all smug, just knowing where it came from.
So I text my mom back, and I keep cleaning, my stupid phone stupidly silent, annoyingly dark.
That bastard always hated me.
The phone I mean.
So I put some new sheets on my bed. Cuz, you know, even though I changed them a few days ago they should be fresh, yes?
This is silly really. I KNOW we’re both doing the same thing. We’re both so damn stubborn. The knowledge makes me smile bittersweetly, almost a cringe. Oh, bother.
I almost wanna turn off my phone, just so it won’t torture me. ALMOST.
But then, you know… what if I miss it?