If I wasn’t sure that I have aligned myself with the right party, all I needed to do was look at the shenanigans of Ralph Nader and his one word press conference, and then, at 11pm when John McCain announced that he was a loser, and his supporters, ever the class acts, booed.
That’s fine. You can boo.
HE’S STILL YOUR PRESIDENT.
And so in the grand tradition of how we do it around here, I would like to present you with a list that X
helped me cook up.
Things Obama Should Do now that he is President
1. Organize a fish fry and electric slide contest on the White House lawn to help pay down the deficit.
2. Announce that the Inauguration Ball is now a costume party, and come as the cover from the New Yorker.
3. Have Minister Louis Farrakhan participate in anything.
4. Give an interview to Fox News…
That consists entirely of him looking into the camera, waving, and saying, “Hi haters.”
5. Replace Michelle’s entire wardrobe with dashikis, all black, and berets.
6. Visit a mosque.
7. Go to a drag show.
8. Request to enter all events to the tune of “Swagger Like Us” rather than “All Hail the Chief”. “Champion” by Kanye West is also an acceptable substitute.
9. Agree to a series of townhall style meetings.
10. Call Jesse Jackson and ask him how he planned to swing from his nuts if he wanted to cut them off.
11. Look into installing a stainless steel grill in the White House.
12. Name William Ayers as his daughter’s godfather.
13. Insist on being sworn in by Jeremiah Wright.
14. Greet all press corps with, “What’s crackin’ lil bitches.”
16. Appoint Niecey Nash as the Secretary of the Department of the Interior.
17. Point and laugh at anyone who suggests that affirmative action is no longer neccessary.
18. Ask Elisabeth Hasselbeck to be the director of a new group called Radical Conservatives for the Colored Guy.
19. From now on only greet Senator Mccain by saying, “Up high!!!” and raising his hand above his head for a high five.
20. Have a swag suite at the Innauguration Ball… gifting all of Oprah’s favorite things.
What else should he do? Leave it in the comments!!! In the meantime…