25 Things About 25

Here are some things I have learned since turning 25 that I think are important to share with you… you know, cuz I’m so wise and shit.

1. When you’re feeling sorry for yourself, you SHOULD NOT go shopping.

2. Tattoos hurt. Especially on thin skin. Since it’s been 3 years since your last one, you’ll forget this and think you’re a soldier, but alas… you are not. You may or may not wind up straddling a chair looking topless and whimpering like a little bitch.

3. Birthdays are not for diets. Or at least not diets that don’t involve cupcakes and Mexican food.

4. Boys in basketball shorts are insufferably sexy. If said boys can actually ball, I may or may not entertain putting out at half court.

5. You should always get laid on your birthday.

6. Someone will always find a way to ruin your day if they can. The trick is to get so drunk that you don’t care. Also…

7. Drinking is more fun if you do it in the middle of the afternoon.

8. Getting older sharpens your math skills. I.e. Vin Diesel + fast cars = wet dreams.

9. When it feels strange that you’ve not gotten fucked up and/or gone to the strip club, you’ve gone over to the bad place.

10. Friends are better when you know how to appreciate them.

11. Just like dick.

12. You know you’ve grown up when you stop before going shopping to… pay bills.

13. It really isn’t them… Its you.

14. You know you love someone when you will share your space with them… And not kill them when they eat in your bed.

15. Blackberries are the devil… dance around the flames.

16. You’re nobody til somebody side eyes what you’re wearing.

17. Its ok to freak out about a gray hair… If for no other reason than it will prepare you for how you’ll react to the others that are soon to follow.

18. Psycho calling/texting gets even less cute with age.

19. Find a good pedicurist… Your days of being able to reach your toes are numbered.

20. On your birthday (especially in the case of #1) you can convince yourself that you absolutely need that $200 pair of shoes or other ridiculous item. You absolutely do not. That being said…

21. I need a meerkat.

22. If you don’t want to hear from people you long convinced yourself you didn’t know, don’t put your birthday on face.book.

23. No, the aquarium ISN’T less fun because you stopped to pay your Cap One bill before you went.

24. Sometimes speeding is good for the environment… or… the… greater good of… humanity. Yeah.

25. Twenty-five feels different than twenty-four. No bullshit.

9 thoughts on “25 Things About 25

  1. At 25 I had been married for 3 years and had two baby boys…lving in a marriage that would have never happened had I not gotten preggers with first baby boy.I have been getting pedi’s since I was 14…just a tad bit pampered back in the day.I haven’t had my tat on the top of my foot for a year yet and I am already looking to get the tramp stamp ASAP.Bills? Ummm, I haven’t learned that one…so you are one up on me on paying bills…lol


  2. You ain’t lyin about number three…they do birthday cakes and pizza for everybody who has a birthday at my job, and I must’ve put on 10 POUNDS my last birthday.Welcome to the wonderful world of 25 and up!


  3. yes! 25 is great! and it is so different than either years on either side. enjoy it girl!i love #7. i used to kill that on set fridays right before my 1115 class.wait, that’s not the afternoon yet.did you watch meerkat manor?? i wanted a meerkat for an entire season!


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