(day 19 of 30)
There was a time in my online life, harkening way back to the days of BlackPlanet, when I felt it necessary to respond to everyone. Every message, every comment got a response. And as time wore on, the same thing proved true for MySpace and blogs and Facebook comments and emails and IMs. No matter what the comment, if I had anything of value to add or not, whether it was convenient for me or not, everything got a response.
It wasn’t until fairly recently that I realized not everybody deserves to be engaged. I didn’t need to respond out of polite I obligation. Not everyone deserves my engagement or even my acknowledgement. I am not under any responsibility to explain myself or convince anyone or entertain everyone.
Before long, I found this behavior spilling over into my everyday life. Suddenly I was free of circular arguments and done with inconveniencing myself for the appeasement of others. And the people I did engage reaped the benefit of me making an active choice to participate in our interaction. Being invested in it, choosing it, rather than allowing it to just happen to me.
It’s so incredibly liberating.