A small voice inside kept saying, “I need to be quiet.” I argued with it. My silence is restriction. Reasoned with it. I am not a quiet person. Ignored it. But still it said, “Be quiet.” The days droned on in blended shades of gray. The peaks and valleys were still situated around a baseline … Continue reading Be Quiet
Category: See? I Have Issues
Soon
Soon, I promise myself. Soon.I will do it soon. It’s important. And I need it. But I’m not ready.But soon. Soon I will be. Soon comes. And I punt. It’s too big a loss right now, and it is. It’s too much change. It’s a lot to go without. I need the crutch. And I … Continue reading Soon
Gone
Sometimes I watch the news from back home late at night. I wade through random snippets of videos and articles about a weave robbery and a soldier coming home, searching. Sometimes I'll walk by a TV and a headline will catch my eye and I'll stop and watch and won't even realize I'm holding my breath … Continue reading Gone
The Mausoleum
Coming back to New Orleans is like walking the graveyard of all the women I used to be. Who I was when I was young and dumb and deliriously in love. When I was chasing my food with laxatives. When I was broke and struggling at a dead end job. Before the dark years. Before … Continue reading The Mausoleum
Baptism
Mykonos, GreeceJune 2016I find God in the water.From the moment the water curls up the shore and hits my toes, I feel my life lifting off me. I wade in up to my waist, the water cool and refreshing and an impossible blue. I let a salty wave scoop me up in its palm and float. … Continue reading Baptism
Outside Your Door
It's 2am and there's no good reason for anyone to be knocking on my door. Granted, I'm not asleep but I should be, as usual. And I'm not expecting anyone.My heart picks up tempo as I slip out of bed, quietly digging my toes into the carpet and padding across the apartment to my front door. I've … Continue reading Outside Your Door
The L Word
"Hey.""Hey."We look at each other, awkward in a way that we usually aren't. We aren't sure who should go first."You called.""I called."The truth is, I'd wrestled with it, turning my phone over and over in my hand like a sorcerer's stone. Debating. If I should call. Weighing what it means about me, who I am, … Continue reading The L Word
Roots
I am often consumed by the desire to lay waste to my life and start it over again. I don't mean some overly dramatic Eat, Pray, Love kinda reset. I don't see me setting fire to my world just to watch the flames. But sometimes in the morning, when I turn the key in the lock on … Continue reading Roots
Curtains
I was hitting my marks perfectly. Finding my light and delivering each line with grace and wit. I was being charming. I was being funny. And sexy at the right time. And smart at the right time. I was listening and reeling him in and saying the right thing, because that's what I do.And I … Continue reading Curtains
An Opening
It's always fun when it's new.When it's all shameless flirting and bubbling sexual tension. When it's texting long missives and witty replies and conversations that stretch into the late/early hours like you don't have anywhere to report to in the morning. When everything is laughs and life stories shared in hushed confessional. That place right … Continue reading An Opening
Liquor, Loans & Love 